I believe once in a lifetime, you meet someone so special; they have a light so bright & beautiful that you can see so clearly, but they don’t. You just want to tap into that. But you’re not the only one who sees that light. Some people get dealt a battle so intense, they could be in it for years. The enemy sees those brightest lights, and want to snuff them straight out. It’s tough when you connect with someone like this. They will hurt & disappoint you, themselves & everyone around them while their in the battle. This poem s my experience. I think it taught me so much. People, love yourself .
So it took me too long to get here.
Even I know that.
Was I the last to know?
No. I was the first.
But, like you, I am comfortable clinging to my excuses.
“I’m a believer in the Good to come.”
The Good, Hope & Love is already here.
“I am faithful.”
O.k., that’s what I’m supposed to be.
So attracted to your light.
Shown to me in short stanza’s.
It’s like your staccato, alive.
Dancing, here, there, everywhere
So, when I hold you, for those moments
& you’re quiet, still, childlike…
I feel the song, the dance inside.
& then I feel so alive.
It’s addicting my selfishness.
I see clearly, but continue…
But these moments, are just that, moments.
See dancing light & staccato sound won’t be held for too long.
& withholding your light has become your craft…
& you don’t even know it.
It almost seems at times
As if you yourself are
Trying to smother the Light, the Gift given to you.
Me, I was like a child who sees the beautiful flame of the fire
Just wanted to touch it once
Which turned into Again.
And Again, which then became Again again.
With you I laughed like I had never laughed.
But- because of you, I’ve also cried…
Like I have never cried.
So after too long came,
Here I am- with Again, again.
I’m still learning:)
Yeah, I ache for you,
But not for you.
The lesson- I can’t keep dimming my light believing in
Hope or Love
for someone else.
I can only believe for self.
So, today, after too long
I decided not to be your throw away girl-